


Finding Definition

by wesleyfanfiction_archivist



Category: Angel: the Series, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-01-29
Updated: 2004-01-29
Packaged: 2018-07-12 08:38:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,193
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7094578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wesleyfanfiction_archivist/pseuds/wesleyfanfiction_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Part 4 of "The Definition Series." You can find definition. Now it's just a case of finding a way out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Finding Definition

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Versaphile, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [WesleyFanfiction.net](http://fanlore.org/wiki/WesleyFanFiction.Net). Deciding that it needed to have a more long-term home, I began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in February 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact the e-mail address on [WesleyFanfiction.net collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/wesleyfanfiction/profile).

Author's Note: This is almost the end of the series, with the 'ships (hopefully!) coming together. There will be another one, just one more, about the aftermath. Hopefully it won't take as long to get out as this did. This fic has been written, then re-written a million times, it even went through a "Ghost" inspired phase before I settled on this final version. Hope I made the right choice. Also, this is long because there's a lot to pack in.

*** 

Dawn tumbled ungracefully to the ground, her cheek and hands hitting the ground hard. She looked up and saw the portal zip shut. She shivered, Spike's hand clamped around her elbow, yanking her to her feet. He ran a hand quickly over her shoulders, checking for damage. She shrugged him off a little, but he caught hold of her chin and turned her face side to side. He tutted.

"What?" she asked, pulling his hand away.

"You've cut your cheek," he muttered, shaking his arm so that the cuff of his shirt dangled past the sleeve of his duster and he wiped the spot of blood away.

"Thanks," she said, smiling a little. 

Then she stopped, staring around. They had landed on a large flat plateau, behind her, the drop was sharp, a drop into a swirling black sea. In front of her was a crown of tall spiked rocks, reaching to the thick purple sky, split by the occasional streak of silver lightning crackling through the air.

"Wow," she breathed, turning to face the sea that stretched to the horizon. She gulped, stepping back away from the edge as something large and black arched out of the sea and sank back in again, "but not in a good way."

When she looked back toward Angel and Spike, Spike was gripping Angel's upper arm and glaring at him. 

"What's wrong?" she asked, coming back toward them.

"Nothing," Spike snapped immediately, giving Angel a warning look and a tiny shake of his head.

"Angel?" Dawn turned to the taller vampire, grabbing hold of him to pull him away from Spike's grasp. She saw Angel's gaze rest on her for a second, before flickering to Spike and then over to the row of rocks. 

She followed his gaze and her fingers dug into his forearms as her knees shook. The person watching them from a distance ducked down behind the rocks.

"No," Dawn whispered, "no. Wait!" she shoved Angel out of her way, "stop! Wesley!"

***

He ran. 

The lightning had crackled, snapping violently through the air repeatedly. It had drawn him toward the row of rocks and he clambered up to see a tall man tumble through a portal. Followed by a slender bleached blonde. Then a beautiful brunette. He couldn’t have left if he wanted to at that point.

He didn’t know how long he had been here. 

He remembered when he first arrived here. How he had lain on the plateau for ages until he forced himself up, scooping up his sword. He had peered down into the tumultuous sea, heaving, thick and black. He had backed away, stumbling as he hit the incline. He turned then, away from the empty scene before him to claw his way up to the rocks. 

Only when he got to the top, there was nothing apart from twisted caves and pathways as far as the eye could see. He had slumped against one of the sharp rocks and sobbed. Then he had eased himself down the cliff face, found himself a fairly dry and mercifully empty cave and waited, hand on sword, for something to attack, anything to distract from his current situation. 

Then, when nothing came, when countless investigations told him that there was no other living thing here apart from himself, he waited for someone to find him. 

They never came. 

And then he found something else to worry about.

The screams.

The first one woke him from a fitful doze. He never found the source of the screams.

But he soon found out why they screamed.

Not screams of pain, they were sobs, cries of anguish and pain.

It could have been hours or it could have been days, he never knew. All he knew was that a little while after he arrived here; Spike sauntered into the cave. Whispering about how thankful he was that Dawn could get on with her life now. So glad he could be the one to help her get over it.

Then there had been Fred.

Angel.

Gunn.

Andrew.

Dawn.

It seemed whatever controlled these mirages knew it had found the perfect torture in Dawn. And there were so many different ways to use her.

"You think I'd try and find you when you chose to do this?"

"I'm fine, Wesley, you don’t have to worry about me. I'm over it. Really over you."

"I thought you should know. I've… found someone else. I know it's only been a few weeks, but Andrew's been good to me. I'm in love with him. I think he's the one. Are you happy for me?"

Then he knew why they screamed.

And he screamed too.

He shook away the memories, sliding down the cliff-face, tearing his sweater. He ran down the uneven tracks and threw himself into his cave. He stumbled, felt blood ooze from his knees as he crashed into the ground, but he pulled himself up. He reached for the wall, guiding himself through the dark to the end of the cave. He curled into the corner and drew his knees up, grabbing his sword.

He heard, distantly, a yell as either Angel or Spike crashed into the ground after descending the cliff. He pushed himself back into the corner. 

It was ridiculous really, that he thought he could hide from them. He remembered the first time, how afterwards he found another cave. But Fred found him; hunkered down and told him that things were fine, no one noticed he was gone, good job they had her and Dawn to take over after he disappeared, huh?

It never mattered how far he ran, how well he tried to hide, how hard he pressed his hands to his ears, they always found him, always made him hear.

"Wesley?" 

He heard Dawn's yell, felt his throat tighten as he pressed into the wall, the rough stone scratching through his sweater.

"Go away, go away, go away, go away," he chanted.

"Wesley?" he heard Spike yell, then Angel and each time they sounded closer.

That's new, the way they trying to make him come to them. But it's ruthless nonetheless and he wants none of it. 

But he has no choice, he has never had any choice in these mirages and Dawn is the first to appear in the mouth of the cave. 

"Wes?" her voice has grown tentative, the way she used to talk to him when he was in a bad mood or had a headache. It always made him feel guilty and he would hug her to prove he was just a grumpy old man and that it had nothing to do with her.

He resisted the urge to hug her now. 

He heard the heavy stomp of Spike and Angel and stared up a them as they reached the back of the cave and looked down at him. Spike's expression was curious, possibly even suspicious, as though he was trying to figure him and the whole situation out. Angel's expression was unreadable, an odd mix and guilt, relief and for some reason, something that looked suspiciously like disappointment in the man huddled at his feet. 

"Wesley?" Spike asked, reaching out a hand to help him up. 

Dawn pushed between the two of them, her face lighting up with a huge grin. She came toward him and he grabbed his sword, thrusting it between them to keep her at bay. Her smile faltered, her eyes widened and Spike and Angel exchanged glances.

"It's me," she whispered, starting to crouch down and stretch out her hand to him, "it's me, Wes. It's Dawn." 

He shrank away from her, using the sword as a barrier to keep her hands away. She can't touch him. She never touched him before. It didn’t work like that.

"It's me," she said, frowning, reaching for one of his hands, "it's me, I'm here. Wesley?"

"Get out," he managed hoarsely.

"Hang on a minute, Percy!" Spike protested.

"Get out!" Wesley repeated, voice rising, "get out! I'm not listening! Do you hear me? I'm. Not. Listening."

"What?" Dawn directed the question to the vampires behind her.

"It's us, Wes," Angel said, "you know us."

"I don’t," he replied firmly, "get out. You can't do this to me anymore."

Dawn stood up sharply and backed away, into Spike who stumbled a little into the wall of the cave. She stalked past him, shoulders stiff and head high.

Angel gave Wesley an odd look, disbelief mingled with that disappointment, before following Dawn. 

Wesley pushed his fingers into his hair, grabbed two fistfuls and squeezed. When he looked up, it was to be faced with Spike's look of venomous anger.

"Look," he hissed, hunkering down to sneer into Wesley's face, "what's your problem? How dare you do that? There's no way I'm letting you break her heart after everything she's done to get you back. Now, I played along with your whole Lolita fetish for while, but -"

The sword clattered to the floor as Wesley's fist connected sharply with Spike's jaw, knocking him over as Wesley lunged. He pinned the vampire to the floor, fists in his shirt.

"Lolita?" Wesley hissed, "you don’t have a clue, you sick -"

He stopped, hands suddenly relaxing their grip on Spike's shirt, bringing one slowly to his face to stare in the dim light at his reddened knuckles then at Spike still sprawled, pinned and glaring on the floor.

"My God," Wesley muttered, "I touched you. You're real."

***

"Dawn! Dawn, wait!"

"Wait for what, Angel?" Dawn shouted, turning sharply to face him, "wait for Wesley to act like I'm the Devil incarnate again?"

"Calm down," Angel grabbed her shoulders, "he didn’t mean it."

"Y'know," she took a deep breath, "when I was researching this whole thing, I actually thought that seeing him again would be… I don’t know, just… not like that. I pictured running into each other's arms, kissing. Tears, even. Not that. What the hell was that?"

"I don’t know, but I do know he didn’t mean that."

"How do you know?"

"Because this is Hell, Dawn," he answered simply, "and I know a thing or two about Hell. Don’t you remember what I was like when I came back? I was different, but I was fine after a little while," he paused, eyes staring into some distant past before he added softly, "because Buffy saved me."

"I've gotta save him?" Dawn asked, voice tiny.

"Yeah," he nodded.

"So opening the portal wasn’t enough, there's more?" the tears were clearing from her eyes, voice taking on a cheerier tone.

"There's always more," Angel replied with a smile.

"Oi, Bit! You gonna give your bloke a proper hello or not?"

Dawn looked beyond Angel toward Spike who was steering Wesley in front of him down the rocky corridor. Dawn shot Angel a smile before skirting around him and racing toward Wesley, tripping over rocks as she scrambled towards him. She launched himself into his arms and Spike laughed as he grabbed hold of Wesley as he staggered back under Dawn's weight.

She snuggled into Wesley's shoulder, running her hands over his shoulders and back, then up to push through his hair as she kissed his neck. Wesley squeezed her tight, a little too tightly, but Dawn didn’t give a damn.

"Well, there's an improvement," Spike commented to Angel as he approached them, "that was a quick rescue if ever there was one, huh, Pansy?"

"It's not as though there's much to look through and many people to find," Angel replied, ignoring the nickname as he looked around, "there's not much here."  
"Mmm," Spike murmured in agreement, leaning his wooden spear against the wall of the rock corridor and slipping his hands into his pocket, "so, Wes, mate, what d'you do for eats round here?" 

There was no answer and Spike tried again. He sighed at the answering silence and rolled his eyes at the joyous couple.

"What's a bloke gotta do to get some food around here?"

***

Seated on the floor of his cave, Wesley thought how odd it was that he was comfortable. This same floor that gave him bruises that he tried to sleep, suddenly feels soft and yielding with Dawn sitting between his legs, back leaning against his chest. He stroked her hair and kissed her head, aware of her fingers tightening every now and again in his; as though making sure he's not going anywhere again. 

Angel and Spike sat across from him. Angel nibbling politely at the berries Wesley plucked from a claw like tree three caves down. Spike, however, is pulling a face, lip curling in disgust.

"You've been living on this junk?" he asked incredulously, voice echoing in the dim darkness.

"Yes," Wesley shrugged, "everyone needs food and water, Spike, those have both."

"They taste like crap," Spike mumbled, tossing a handful away, watching them bounce down the cave and out into the purple light.

"Yes, well, this is Hell," Wes answered.

"Exactly, so when are we getting outta here?" he demanded.

"When I can figure out how," Dawn replied.

Angel choked, thumping his chest.

"What?" he asked, "you mean you don’t know?"

"I have an idea!" she answered defensively, "it's just needs some tweaking, ok?"

"So, we're stuck here then," Spike sighed, "bloody brilliant."

"No, we're not stuck here," Dawn said firmly.

"Wes has been here for six months, don’t you think he would have found the way out if there was one?" Angel asked delicately.

"Don’t -" Spike started, then stopped as Wesley slowly disentangled himself from Dawn and moved to the mouth of the cave.

"Wes?" Dawn asked, scrambling after him.

Spike sighed and stood to follow them, Angel picked up his axe and Dawn's abandoned bag of weapons. 

"Nothing here, remember?" Spike said, sneering at the axe.

"Always be prepared," Angel replied, giving him a poke with the axe in the direction of the mouth of the cave.

"You ain't no Boy Scout, Angel, don’t pretend to be," Spike chortled, "ah, great. Where're they going?"

Angel looked in the direction Spike was looking and saw Dawn and Wesley clambering up the gentle incline toward the plateau.

"I don’t know," Angel answered, tucking his axe into the bag and heading toward the cliff, "but there's something happening. Can't you feel it?"

"You asking me if I can feel the force?" Spike asked, starting to climb the cliff, "well, uh, now you ask. Yeah."

Angel reached the summit first and pulled himself up. Wesley and Dawn were standing in the middle of the plateau, before gently simmering air.

"Bloody hell," Spike muttered, "this really is a popular vacation destination."

"Didn’t you give Fred Dawn's notes?" Angel asked, a nervous edge to his voice.

"What? Yeah," he turned his head slowly to meet Angel's eyes, "oh, bugger. But she wouldn’t, would she?"

"Oh, yes she would," Angel nodded, approaching the place the portal was about to open. Spike pulled Dawn back a little, as the portal ripped open.

"English?" 

Gunn stared for a moment at Wesley, before grabbing him in a bear hug, mindless of the others falling through the portal after him. Fred, then Andrew and then - to Angel's complete and utter surprise - Buffy. Wesley quickly disappeared beneath hugs and delighted squeals. Buffy was the first to pull away and grab Dawn, hissing something about never scaring her like that again before hugging her. Andrew grabbed Dawn next and Fred pushed past them to launch herself at Spike.

"You idiot!" she cried, "do you know how scared you had me? I thought we wouldn’t get any of you back. Don’t you ever do that to me again. Do you understand me? What are you laughing at?"

"Nothing, Slim, nothing at all," he chuckled before kissing her.

Angel watched Gunn pry Andrew from Dawn before Buffy took a step in front of him.

"Hey," she said softly, "so… How come you never let me in on this little escapade?"

"Didn’t know about it 'til after I called you," he shrugged, "why? Were you worried?"

"Well, duh. My sister takes off to another dimension, of course I was worried."

"Oh," he fell silent, smoothing the strap of the weapon bag to avoid her eyes.

"Oh, c'mere, doofus," she laughed and pulled him into a tight hug, "I was worried about all three of you. I was worried about you."

"Really?"

She answered him by kissing him impulsively. She blushed when she pulled away, but he took her hand

"Hey, guys. Lorne can't keep this portal open forever," Gunn called, "and there's a party waiting back home."

Fred and Spike stepped through first, then Gunn bundled Andrew through and followed him. Buffy and Angel waited to bring up the rear as Dawn took Wesley's hand and walked through the portal with him.

***

He was sleeping soundly, crashed out on one of the couches in Angel's office, pointed party hat askew. She could hear the party going on down the hall, a celebration of the wanderer's return. Apparently they had been gone a day and a half. Thinking about it, it had felt like that long, but she hadn't known it at the time. There were no days in that dimension, only a constantly deep purple sky. 

He frowned in his sleep and Dawn caught his hand, shifting beside him to hold him closer as she kissed his brow. Mirages, Andrew told her, were the offered torture of that particular Hell dimension and she shuddered at the very thought.

She smiled as she heard Andrew mangling She's Like The Wind.

"Feel her breath on my face,

Her body close to me,

Can't look in her eyes,

She's out of my league,

Just a fool to believe, 

I have anything she needs,

She's like the wind."

As the song died away, she distantly heard Fred suggesting they get home to bed.

"One more toast!" Gunn protested, "to Wes. And to Dawn, for being so damned stubborn."

She heard a chorus of "To Wes and Dawn!" and smiled, yawning, snuggling against Wesley and closing her eyes. 

Wes opened his eyes and watched Dawn doze off. He listened to the party wind down and his friends lurch down the corridor. The door creaked open and they peered in at the couple asleep on the couch.

"Should we wake them and get them home?" Fred asked in a whisper.

"No," Buffy answered.

"Let 'em sleep, Slim," Spike added, closing the door silently.

Wes closed his eyes.

And smiled. 

 

THE END

Just in case you're wondering why Spike, Dawn and Angel found Wesley, but now of the others that screamed, that'll be explained in the next (and last) fic, "Living With Definition."


End file.
